* Ladkiyan apna dupatta ladke k samne aane k baad hi kyon theek karti
Luteron ko dekh kar hi Daulat ki hifazat ka khayal Aata hai!
* Ek Church k gate pe likha tha: Jo paap kar k thak gaye wo meri
sharan me aaye.
Ek callgirl ne niche apna mob no likh diya: Jo nahi thake wo meri sharan
* Marry and make a woman happy OR remain a bachelor and make several
* A pregnant lady went to an astrologer.
Astrologer: When u deliver a baby, baby's father will die.
Lady: Thank god! My husband is safe!
* Teacher class mein apne baby ko doodh pilate hue boli: Ale ale mela
beta dudh p k doctor banega.
Santa: Mam! Thoda hame bhi pila do hum compounder hi ban jaayenge.
* How do u identify a true music lover?
A man when he hears a woman singing in the bathroom and puts his ear to
the keyhole instead of his eye!
* Buffalo par baithe ek jaat koTRAFFIC police ne rok k puchha: Aap ka
helmet kahan hai? Fine lagega.
Jaat: Re baawale, dhayan se dekh Neeche, 4 wheeler hai !
* Aunty, mummy ne chini mangi hai.
Aunty: Aacha aur kia kaha mummy nay?
Kid: Agar woh kamini na de, to Pinki aunty se lay aana.
* Baap: Beta maine tere liye ek ladki dekhi hai, Vo Roopvati, Gunvati,
or Sarasvati hai.
Beta: Lekin papa mein kisi or se pyar karta hoon or vo.. Garbhvati hai.
* Height of Marwari Kanjusi: Looking for a second Hand Tata Nano
Car.......preferably with Gas Kit!!!
* Grammar Teacher: Rahul sharaab Nahin Peeta Hai. Is sentence mein
Rahul kya hai?
Pappu: Madam! Rahul chutiya hai...
* What's the biggest pressure for Pak captain when Pak needs 1 run to
win in 8 ovrs, with 5 wickets in hand?
Ya Allah! How to speak English in presentation ceremony?
* Pappu: Dad, mein biwi nu sms kita ki main Raat nu aunga, ghar aaya
te kisi hor de nal suti si.
Dad: Puttar galti mobile company di aa, jede time nal sms nahi bhejde!
* 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a
logical statement that 90% of accidentsarer due to driving without
drinking! Piyo Sar Utha Ke
* Banta: How do you say Topless in Urdu?
Santa: KHULE AAM...
* There are only 5 things we need in life: Good friends, Good job,
Good food, Good sleep & Good _ UCK. Whatever u are thinking... is right.
* Young Malkin & Pappu Naukar were kidnapped & raped by robbers.
Malik to Naukar: Shakal Dekhi thi un logon ki?
Pappu Naukar: Bibi ji se pucho mujhe to ulta litaya hua tha!
* Daru se Nasha badhta hai, Nashe se junun. Junun se mehnat, Mehnat se
paisa, Paise se izzat.Isliye Izzatdar wohi hai jo Daru pita hai !
* Chandni raat thi, nadi ka kinara tha, asmaan me taro ka nazara tha,
Bihari premi ne pyar se muskarate hue Biharan premika se kaha: Ae Susma,
Bidi Piyegi ?
* A cute Nurse came 4 the interview.
Dr: What salary U Xpect?
Dr was overjoyed & said: My Pleasure.
Nurse: With pleasure it's 25,000
* When things go wrong, when sadness fills your heart, when tears
flows from your eyes always say these words... Eh Ganpat, chal daru
* Lalu: Rabri, tum to hamara CHAND ho.
Rabri: Na ji hamka CHAND VAND mat kahiye, ye sasure America wale roj
Chand pe chadte utarte rahte hai.
* Breaking News: Latest sponsor of the Indian Cricket Team: Whisper
BCCI felt it appropriate as the team is undergoing its worst PERIOD!
* In order to get 100/100 in life, a man requires 100% talent, whereas
a woman requires only 4% talent & the remaining is only 36-24-36
* Ladke wale ladki ka haath kab mangte hai???????????
JAB LADKE KA HAATH THAK JATA HAI...............
* Tumhari Girl friend ka sms mila hai kahti hai koi patthar se na
maare mere deewana ko twenty first century hai bomb se uda do saale ko.
* Jija: Sali ji, aapke yahan ki sabse mash-hoor cheez kaunsi hai?
Sali: Jija ji, jo mash-hoor thi, usey to aap le gaye!
* An old rich man marries a young gal. Interviewer asks the girl: Apne
inmein shaadi ke liye kya dekha?
Girl: Ek to inki income aur doosre inke din kum.
* Bengali patient: Doc sahab, potla-potla totti aata hai, khane ko man
nahin karta hai.
Doc: Yeh lo dawai, mota-mota totti aayega, jaise marzi kaat ke khana
* Food for thought: Why to suffer trying by all means to become rich
and wear expensive branded clothes, when best things in life we do
* Teacher to class: A for?
Teacher: Jor Se Bolo
Class: Jai Mata Di
* Population slogan in Bihar: Hum Do Hamare Do, Unke Baad Jitne Bhi
Hon, Sabko Delhi,Punjab aur Haryana bhej do
* Mallika went to a swimming pool in a BRA & PANTY.
Guard: Madam here 2 piece costume is not allowed!
Mallika: Kaun sa utaroon?
* Mom: Tujhe ladka pasand aaya ho to baat agey chalayen. Girl: Ladka
to theek hai but mota hai. Mom: TV chahe 14" ka ho ya 29" ka remote 6"
ka hi hota hai.
* In chemistry class teacher asked a gal: what r Nitrates
Gal answered shyly: night rates, they r costlier than day.
* Q: Which boy has the permission to get into a girls' bathroom and
touch her anywhere she likes?
* A Guy picks up a girl for the date. Why are u wearing ur belt around
Girl: I promised my mom that I wouldn't let you touch me below my belt.
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